Fictional Character
"We Install"
Science Fiction
Type of Appearance: Direct narrator, unnamed
Nationality: n/a
Spouse: Debbie

The Narrator was relaxing in his recliner when the doorbell rang. It was twenty minutes to dinner so he got up and went to the door to check. He saw a dweeby-looking guy in khakis and a blue polo shirt with a company logo on the left breast and a clipboard in his hand. Not looking like a home-invasion robber, the narrator opened the door and asked "Yes?" The man introduced himself as Eric with Superior Solar and that they were in the neighborhood installing solar systems. Given this, he could offer new systems with a very attractive discount.

The narrator checked with Debbie, his wife who was in the kitchen preparing supper and who confirmed they could afford a new system especially since their existing one came with the place, was "as old as the hills" and "a piece of junk". The narrator invited Eric in and he spread out some pictures of systems and a price list on the dinning-room table. The narrator saw one he liked and again checked with Debbie whether they could afford it. She confirmed they could and the narrator then asks when Superior Solar could install it. Eric replied they had a tech crew in the neighborhood and could start the next morning. If it was a straightforward job, they could finish by that afternoon. He then asked if he could go up onto the roof to check out the current installation to which the narrator and Debbie agreed.

They stepped outside and the narrator leaned a ladder against the side of the house. He first checked Eric's insurance and then the two climbed up. Eric was careful to step over the oorts and kuipers as he approached the system showing he had done this before. He then bent over to examine the power unit more closely and concluded that the narrator could do with a new one since this one was 5x109 and ones this size don't usually last past 1x1010. The narrator became defensive and said that it came with the house but Eric only said that he was smart to replace it while it still kinda worked.

Eric took out a loupe and examined the sixth wanderer. He asked about the ring and the narrator replied that a couple of outliers had smashed together a while ago breaking up. Since it didn't seem to hurt anything, he left it alone. Eric tutted about the poor workmanship and pointed out the grit between Five and Four as another example. The narrator then asked him to take a look at wanderer three since it had looked kind of funny recently. Eric did and announced it had gone mouldy and that it would need to be sterilized before before they could recycle it. He fiddled around a bit as the narrator got hungrier until he invited Eric for supper. Eric got the message, declined saying he had more houses to cover.

The two climbed down and told Debbie what they had found about wanderer three. She was was grossed out and then asked if it would cost extra. Eric replied that it was all part of the installation fee. He gave them his card and then left to sell more solar systems.