Alien Narrator
Fictional Character
"Hi, Colonic"
Science Fiction
Type of Appearance: Direct narrator, unnamed
Species: Unknown hookworm relative
Occupation: Explorer

A space-explorer and his partner, Iffspay, arrived on the third planet from a medium-heat sun in the search for intelligent life. While the planet had been explored before, the two were under orders to explore again. After losing a roll of the dice to Iffspay, the explorer had to put on a calm suit and collect life forms. He found three in a swamp, paralyzed them, and brought them aboard the ship. After consulting their manuals, the two peeled the locals, and probed them. The first two showed no readings, but the third one did.

The explorer conversed with the intelligent lifeforms that he found. The intelligent lifeforms assured the explorer that they were quite happy with parasitism, rather than the free-living state the explorers had adopted. The explorers returned the three hosts to the planet, lamenting the paperwork they would have to fill out now that they'd discovered intelligent life.